5 Best Ways to Handle Being Ghosted (with Quotes & Citations)
💔 1. Acknowledge the Pain and Allow Yourself to Grieve
It’s okay to be sad, angry, or confused. Don’t minimize your feelings just because there was no formal breakup. Ghosting is a real form of emotional loss.
- Action: Give yourself a set time to feel the emotions (a day or two), then commit to moving forward. Avoid the urge to obsessively check their social media or re-read old texts.
- Quote: “The only way out is through.” – Robert Frost
- Quote: “Grief is the price we pay for love.” – Queen Elizabeth II
🧘♀️ 2. Resist the Urge to Seek Closure from Them
The ghosting itself is your closure. Someone who values you and respects your time would not disappear without a word. Chasing after an explanation will likely only lead to more pain or silence.
- Action: Write down everything you would want to say in a letter, but do not send it. This helps process the thoughts without engaging with the person.
- Quote: “Closure happens right after you accept that getting it is impossible and then start moving on with your life.” – Laura Dave, The Last Thing He Told Me
- Quote: “Not getting an answer is also an answer.” – Unknown
🌟 3. Focus on the Reality, Not the Fantasy
It’s easy to romanticize the person and the connection when they suddenly leave. Remind yourself that a person who truly cared would not treat you this way. Ghosting reveals a lack of maturity and communication skills.
- Action: Make a brief list of the facts (e.g., “They stopped responding on [date],” “They didn’t communicate a reason”). When you start idealizing them, look at the list.
- Quote: “A man wrapped up in himself makes a very small bundle.” – Benjamin Franklin
- Quote: “The cruelest lies are often told in silence.” – Robert Louis Stevenson
💖 4. Reaffirm Your Self-Worth
Their silence is a reflection of their character, not yours. Your value is inherent and is not determined by whether someone chooses to respond to your messages.
- Action: Dedicate time to activities that make you feel capable and happy (hobbies, exercise, creative projects). Treat yourself like your own best friend.
- Quote: “You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.” – Buddha
- Quote: “Don’t let someone who isn’t worth your love make you forget how much you are worth.” – Karen Salmansohn
🚪 5. Understand That Their Absence Is a Gift
See the ghosting as an early warning sign that saved you from a relationship with a poor communicator. They did the difficult job of removing themselves from your life so you could find someone who values honesty and respect.
- Action: Block their number and social media if you need to. Create clear boundaries and remove the temptation to check up on them.
- Quote: “When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.” – Maya Angelou
- Quote: “If they disappear, let them.” – Unknown
A Final Thought
“A rejection is nothing more than a necessary step in the pursuit of success. Don’t let someone who has done nothing for you stop you from becoming everything you are capable of.“ – Bo Bennett (Modified)
Here are some healthy and proactive distraction activities, categorized to help you choose what you need most right now:
🧠 Mind and Skill Boosters
These activities engage your brain and help you feel productive, which boosts self-esteem.
- Learn a New Skill: Sign up for an online course (coding, a new language, photography, etc.). The commitment helps structure your time.
- Read a Book Series: Dive into a compelling series (fiction or non-fiction) that requires focus and transports your mind elsewhere.
- Mindfulness/Meditation: Use an app (like Calm or Headspace) to practice staying present. This reduces the mental energy spent obsessing over the past.
- Jigsaw Puzzles or Logic Games: These focus your mind intensely on a task that has a clear, satisfying resolution.
💪 Body and Energy Boosters
Physical activity is one of the best ways to process emotional stress and release feel-good endorphins.
- Try a New Workout Class: Attend a spin, yoga, boxing, or dance class. The new environment and focused instruction are great distractions.
- Go for a Long Walk or Hike: Spending time in nature has proven mood-boosting benefits. Leave your phone in your pocket and just observe your surroundings.
- Take a Dance Break: Put on your favorite upbeat music and dance around your living room for 15 minutes. It’s impossible to feel bad while doing this!
- Cook or Bake: Focus on a complex recipe. The sequential steps and tangible, delicious result are very rewarding.
🎨 Creative and Social Boosters
Connecting with others and expressing yourself are key to healing.
- Start a Creative Project: Whether it’s painting, knitting, journaling, or playing an instrument—creating something channels emotional energy constructively.
- Deep-Clean and Reorganize: Tidy up a specific area (a closet, desk, or bookshelf). A clean, orderly space often leads to a clearer mind.
- Reach Out to Friends: Schedule a phone call, coffee date, or movie night with people who genuinely value you. Lean on your support system.
- Volunteer: Give your time to a cause you care about. Focusing on helping others immediately shifts the attention away from personal pain.
Pro-Tip for Distraction
When you start to ruminate or feel the urge to contact the person, tell yourself, “I will give myself 15 minutes of [Choose a Distraction Activity] first. If I still want to ruminate/contact them afterward, I can.” Most of the time, the activity will break the cycle.
