How To Tell if Someone is Lying

Psychology Today has identified several signs that may indicate someone is lying. These signs include changes in vocal pitch, unusual blinking or fidgeting, reduced use of first-person words, decreased expression of emotional language, avoidance of eye contact (shifty eyes), self-soothing behaviors like ear tugging or neck touching, and inconsistent gestures and facial expressions compared to the message being conveyed.

However, these cues are only effective when observing the person directly. The prevalence of deception on social media has heightened concerns about our society’s ability to discern truth from falsehood.

Research published in Nature Neuroscience reveals that lying triggers the brain’s reward system, potentially leading habitual liars to perpetuate deceit until exposed. Lies have long been a part of human interaction and are used for various reasons, such as protection, manipulation, or self-preservation.

Here are the distinctions between kind-hearted and self-serving lies and how they differ in intentions and outcomes.

White lies, which are also known as kind-hearted lies, are often told to prevent harm or spare someone’s feelings. They are usually intended to protect the emotions of others and maintain harmony in relationships. For instance, if someone gets a new haircut and you don’t like it, telling them that it looks great is a kind-hearted lie that is meant to boost their confidence and avoid hurting their feelings.

On the other hand, self-serving lies are told with the primary intention of benefiting oneself. These lies are often used to manipulate others, avoid consequences, or gain an advantage. For example, lying about your qualifications on a job application to secure a better position is a self-serving lie that ultimately serves your interests at the expense of honesty and integrity.

Kind-hearted lies may seem harmless, but they can still have negative consequences in the long run. By perpetuating falsehoods, trust, and authenticity in relationships can be compromised even with good intentions. In contrast, self-serving lies are inherently deceptive and can lead to a web of lies that is difficult to untangle, damaging personal integrity and relationships with others.

While both kind-hearted and self-serving lies involve deception, their intentions and outcomes differ. Kind-hearted lies are often told to protect others, whereas self-serving lies are designed to benefit oneself at the expense of others. It is essential to consider the motivations behind our lies and strive for honesty and transparency in our interactions with others. Ultimately, the truth may be complicated, but it is the foundation of genuine relationships that rely on trust and respect .

Some signs to look at for:

Change in voice: do they speak at a higher volume?

Do they look away when talking or when smiling does it go to their eyes?

Do they smile at bad situations like a car crash? RUN

Do they tell the best first or just be general?