The Vulnernable Narcissist

By now, we are all familiar with the traits of a narcissist. If you read this blog, you know the havoc they can do!

This individual has an exaggerated sense of self-importance. They belittle others while boosting their image. They show no empathy for anyone except for themselves. They see their accomplishments as unparalleled and possess only the finest possessions.

They deserve the best, after all. But how can you identify a vulnerable narcissist? A Vulnerable narcissist feels the need to shield themselves from critical judgment.

To them, any form of examination feels unfavorable.

They have difficulty accepting compliments, often doubting the intent behind them and twisting the feedback into subtle criticisms. They may also be guarded, sharing only parts of their personality out of fear of emotional devastation.

You may perceive them as feeling powerless and defeated, but also quick to anger over things they feel are lacking.

They often struggle with empathy, primarily because they haven’t received much of it during their upbringing. You might find them somewhat agreeable initially, but their emotional distance can eventually make you feel ignored and perplexed. You may wonder: Are they paying attention to me? What just took place? I believed we connected well, but suddenly, they pulled away or became upset, leaving you uncomfortable without understanding why.

How do you handle a vulnerable narcissist?

Interacting with a vulnerable narcissist requires a quality that they do not possess: empathy. These individuals have emotional scars that have caused them to become defensive.

They express feelings of grandiosity.

There is an atmosphere of arrogant secrecy and undervaluation, manifesting as withdrawal and subdued anger towards others. This individual might experience feelings of depression, but the true issue may lie in a profound sense of vulnerability that prevents them from being wholly genuine and developing a unified sense of identity.

It might seem clichéd, but it isn’t “their fault.” The idea of “fault” could make some readers feel pressured to justify the actions of someone who has caused them significant suffering.

While it might not entirely be their “fault,” they are still responsible for addressing their role in a troubled interpersonal interaction. For the vulnerable narcissist, therapy can be beneficial in clarifying these issues and fostering a more stable self-esteem and a stronger, more resilient sense of identity.

If you are in a relationship with someone who displays these characteristics, aim to be empathetic while also keeping firm and healthy boundaries.

Therapy can help you, as well.